Ambition

I had an interview yesterday with the department chair at a high school in the area and found out that I was not selected to move on to the next round. This news came after a string of previous disappointments trying to pursue a high school teaching job.

I’ve been teaching middle school for nine years and only have one year of high school teaching experience which was my first year in the profession back in 2010. That, in fact, was my favorite year teaching in large part because I love working with the older students.

When I tell everyone that I am not unhappy teaching middle school, I sometimes wonder if I’m trying to convince myself to accept that reality. Middle schoolers are tough, and on some days it feels like I’m doing more baby sitting than teaching.

Even with that said, my district pays well, I’ve established a solid reputation at my school, and my job does afford me the opportunity to coach at the high school in the same community, so I see many of my former students on the playing fields, which is one of the most rewarding aspects of what I do.

My ambition and drive to teach high school remain nevertheless, even with the fact that I am very expensive for a high school, and I do not have a wealth of high school experience. The chair yesterday on the phone told me that I interviewed very well, and that she would keep me in mind for future openings, and then she was very candid with me. “I don’t say this to other candidates,” she concluded, “but I would love to hire you. It’s just that this position involves an AP class and you have no experience teaching AP English. One of the other candidates has been teaching AP English at another high school for six years.”

So there it was, plain as day, the answer to my questions about whether I am doing something wrong during the numerous interviews I’ve had over the last two years. It is a flat out ‘no’. The reason I keep getting past over has nothing to do with me as a teacher, or an interviewer; it has more to do with my qualifications and experience. If a department chair can hire someone who has been in the high school classroom for several years over me who has not, then that’s the direction most of them will go.

The chair’s parting words were, “Stay strong,” and that’s precisely what I’m going to do. I’ve told family members who have witnessed my disappointment time and again that I’m going to give it one more year and then accept my fate as a middle school teacher for the rest of my career. I’m still holding out hope, but with each setback, I become less and less optimistic. Who knows, maybe it will happen; all I can do is keep pushing on and attempting to reach my professional goal.